DISPATCHES FROM THE POP SCENE...MINUS THE CORN SYRUP.

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Here's Kylie Recording "Everybody Hurts"

The other day I made reference (here in the comments) to Kylie Minogue not appearing in the Helping Haiti "Everybody Hurts" video, mentioning that she was somewhat "dressed down" when she cooed her bit for the song in the studio. Above is a pic from her recording session for the song.

Just for the record, I think she looks spectacular here sans makeup. There's only one other person I can think of who's aging more gracefully, and that's me. (Haw haw!) I'm all for more appearances by Au Naturale Kylie in the future.

Meanwhile, Spinner notes that the "Everybody Hurts" charity single has shifted over 150,000 copies in just two days so far in the UK.

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Sade: Classy Band, Classy Broad

Sade (the band) are doing the promo rounds in the U.S. They performed on NBC's The Today Show and BET's 106 And Park today. I love how Sade (the broad) only puts a damn album out whenever she feels like it—i.e. every ten years or so.



This all got me in the mood to dig out the greatest hits, which I listened to today while driving in the rain. Classic jams on that. Reminds me of my mom playing Diamond Life in the mid-'80s.



As for new album Soldier Of Love—which is #1 on Amazon and iTunes—it gets two thumbs up in my book. Nice music for the winter doldrums.

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Dandy Andy Lament "My Lonely Valentine"

What better way to contemplate offing yourself at celebrate Valentine's Day than by listening to Paris-based dance-pop outfit Dandy Andy and their new jam "My Lonely Valentine"? This upcoming UK single release features New York's MC Carmen on vocals, and is being put out by Ian Usher's PopLife Records, who recently scooped up Same Difference.



Classiest lyric: "I've been wondering what you've been doing and where you are—with someone lame I hope!" Gosh, it almost makes me wish I was single this year, so I could share in the disco ball misery.

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Monday, February 08, 2010

The Helping Haiti "Everybody Hurts" Video

No big surprises here with the Helping Haiti "Everybody Hurts" video. It's basically footage of victims of the earthquake with black and white clips of the singers (read the full list of who sang what lines here) edited in.



The single was released in the UK yesterday and is already #1 on iTunes.

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Sunday, February 07, 2010

Somebody Please Put A Hit Out On Jedward And Bring Shayne Ward Back

Ah, poor Jedward. The X Factor dorks were unable to knock synth geek Owl City off the top of the UK chart with their mashup (read: murdering of) "Under Pressure" and "Ice Ice Baby."



But fuck those two. The only X Factor alum I want to hear from is Shayne Ward. And by hear from, I mean him mumbling while half-conscious, shirtless, jeans around the ankles and tied to a tree with an apple in his mouth. (Hey, it's my birthday—let me have some fun!)

We're supposedly one month away from Shayne's new single "Oxygen" being released. I'm just glad that the Heidi Range duet rumor isn't true. 'Cause I'd rip that bitch's weave off with a Rototiller like Kelly Clarkson attacking a plate of spaghetti if she tried anything fresh with Shayne.

And screw Simon Cowell for not inviting the hottest piece of tail to grace the X Factor stage to take part in the Helping Haiti "Everybody Hurts" charity single. (Which, by the way, is already #1 on UK iTunes after being added around midnight last night.) He needs to pull his face out of Susan Boyle's matronly she-taco and realize all things entertainment don't begin and end with that warbling broad. They begin and end with Shayne's ass.

The U.K. Top 10:

1. "Fireflies" - Owl City *3 weeks*
2. "Under Pressure (Ice Ice Baby)" - Jedward *new*
3. "If We Ever Meet Again" - Timbaland feat. Katy Perry
4. "Don't Stop Believin'" - Glee Cast
5. "Empire State Of Mind (Part II)" - Alicia Keys
6. "Replay" - Iyaz
7. "Starstrukk" - 3OH!3 feat. Katy Perry
8. "One Shot" - JLS
9. "Don't Stop Believin'" - Journey
10. "Won't Go Quietly" - Example

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Saturday, February 06, 2010

OMG! It's The New Sabrina Washington Video

My favorite Mis-Teeq story ever: a British friend moved to L.A. in the mid-'00s, and heard the girl group were doing a gig here. This was around when "Scandalous" reached the soaring heights of #35 on the Billboard Hot 100, thanks to its inclusion on the Catwoman soundtrack.

So Paul and his roommate (also a Brit) went to see Mis-Teeq perform...at a seafood restaurant up the PCH, where they lip-synced to three of their UK hits. I think everyone involved—including the girls—couldn't believe life could be so cruel. It's hard out there for a pimp.

Anyway, lead broad Sabrina Washington is finally putting out her first solo album, five years after these strippers broke up. Here's the vid for first single, "OMG":



How very Gaga. Favorite line: "I won't lower myself to smackin' her." BRIT Award-nominated Alesha Dixon, you've been warned.

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Friday, February 05, 2010

An Interview With Alex Gardner Where He Says Something About Being Versatile

Here's a nice interview with 18-year-old Xenomania protege Alex Gardner that was posted on YouTube today by UK radio station Hallam FM.



I like this kid. His first single "I'm Not Mad" (out in March) is pretty rad:



As for his upcoming album, he says, "I've got reggae tracks, rock tracks, blues tracks, drum-driven tracks, bass-driven tracks, ballads... You want it, I've got it."

If they're all as good as "I'm Not Mad," we'll take it.

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Thursday, February 04, 2010

Cyndi Lauper + Lady Gaga: Viva Glam Girls

The MAC Viva Glam print ad with these two broads will be appearing in mags shortly. I love how the undertone of this is basically Lady Gaga sexually assaulting Cyndi Lauper with a string of pearls, a tube of lipstick and her tits. Symbolism—uh, don't even wanna go there.

Oh, just kidding. (Sort of.) Beautiful photo by Ellen Von Unwerth. Go buy this stuff—it's for a good cause, and benefits the MAC AIDS Fund.

Viva Forever!

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It'd Be Really Sad If Taylor Swift Dropped Into A Bottomless Abyss Of Horror

Ah, Taylor Swift. You won all those Grammys, but this week your soundtrack tune "Today Was A Fairytale" falls from #2 to #22 on the Billboard Hot 100. That's it—drop, bitch. Drop into a well, where that soggy broad from The Ring is waiting to take your damn guitar and bash you over the head with it for releasing the same goddamn song over and over again. And fuck Valentine's Day!!!! Expecting innocent people to plunk down cash for a movie that stars Taylor Swift and Ashton Kutcher is like asking them to chug a bucket of battery acid.

That little Canadian mop top Justin Bieber also plummets, from #5 to #25, with "Baby."

And now, onward to charity! Justin Timberlake, Matt Morris and Charlie Sexton's take on "Hallelujah," from the Hope For Haiti Now telethon, jumps up from #48 to #13. Just above, JT and Timbaland's "Carry Out" is at #11.

But coming back to water-logged women, Lady Gaga and Beyonce's "Telephone" moves up one to #19, while Adam Lambert scrapes up to #35 with "Whataya Want From Me."

So, it's been a few weeks since we checked in with The Script. Because quite frankly, the Irish lads were simply taking too long to climb the chart—and they don't get the d'luvvin' unless they work for it. But, lo and behold! In the single's ninth week on the chart, "Breakeven" moves up to #53. That at least gets them a hand down the shorts. For, like, a minute.

The U.S. Top 10:

1. "TiK ToK" - Ke$ha *7 weeks*
2. "Bad Romance" - Lady Gaga
3. "Bedrock" - Young Money feat. Lloyd
4. "Imma Be" - The Black Eyed Peas
5. "Sexy Chick" - David Guetta feat. Akon
6. "How Low" - Ludacris
7. "Replay" - Iyaz
8. "Need You Now" - Lady Antebellum
9. "Hey, Soul Sister" - Train
10. "Hard" - Rihanna feat. Jeezy

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Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Helium Girl Sings Girls Aloud On 'American Idol'

Blimey! It was virtual British invasion on American Idol tonight. Not only did Victoria Beckham return as guest judge, 22-year-old Italian broad Nicci Nix flew her cans all the way from Florence to Denver to belt out Girls Aloud's "Something Kinda Ooooh!" in her audition.

But in case you were worried that she got a Sexy? No! No! No! from Simon Cowell and the gang, she made it through to Hollywood.



Anyway, about 10 minutes later Take That's "Greatest Day" was played as background music in a montage of kiddies nabbing their golden tickets.

All that was missing was for JLS to hop up onto a set of crates while wearing Speedos and start go-go dancing.

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