Girl, 'member how even though as soon as you saw those fanny packs in the '90s, they wuz just tacky, but they got mo' and mo' popular for a long time -- especially with those white folks?
Well, a new kind of trashy fanny pack is back. It's Free Yourself, a pack of songs from "Fanny" Fantasia Barrino, winner of cheese-fest American Idol. You know the voice -- she sound like a cross between Macy Gray and a homeless crackhead 'hood rat, auditioning
for a "Chicken tonight!" commercial!
In other words -- she real ghetto! This debut CD is loaded with R&B driven tunes that someone fished out of Clive Davis's trash can, Xeroxed, and then slapped together as an album. Being an opportunistic yenta, ole Clive couldn't resist putting his name on as "Producer" so he can be first in line to collect them royalty checks.
This CD sounds like something Beyonce and Mary J. might have sputtered out into da toilet bowl after a hard night of drinking -- or taking it up the Jelly by Jay Z. The best highlight is the Ebonics sassy stylin' shout out, "Baby Mama." She black, single, got kids and all that! Check out the lyrics:
I see you get that support check in the mail
Ya open it and your like "What the Hell"
It's about time we had our own song
Don't know what took so long
Cuz now-a-days it like a badge of honer
To be a baby mama
This goes out to all my baby mamas
I got love for all my baby mamas
Let's all hope Fanny's Pack is as short lived as Macy
Gray's career, and not nearly as long as those real fanny packs lasted.