dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

How Is Kelly Clarkson Still Scraping Into The Charts With Her Horrendous New Single?

Kelly Clarkson's worst single (to date, that is -- for sure there is much worse lying in wait like a coiled-up rattler on My December) somehow manages to register high on the British chart this week, despite all the bad press out there. "Never Again" debuts at #9, but at least that travesty has bumped up Enrique Iglesias' "Do You Know" to #3, leaving Kelly Rowland to lay underneath him breathlessly at #4 with whatever that song is that completely flopped here in America.

My favorite new band from last year, Editors, are back with "Smokers Outside The Hospital Doors," the first single off their forthcoming second album. The band members have all gotten about 10 times cuter now that they let their hair grow out.

"Smokers Outside..." debuts at #30 this week, ahead of its CD single release. Some may recall D'luv's botched-yet-still-quite-fun attempt to see Editors live in San Francisco last spring.

At #33, we find another disappointing chart placement for Erasure, who are currently trekking around the U.S. on the True Colors Tour with Cyndi Lauper. "Sunday Girl" is the second case in a row where the B-side -- in this case, the fantastic "Take Me On A Highway" -- far outshines the ho-hum A-side. Why this and the B-Side off previous single "I Could Fall In Love With You" never actually made it onto Light At The End Of The World is anyone's guess. Nevertheless, "Sunday Girl" manages to become the duo's 34th U.K. Top 40 hit over the course of the past 20-and-a-half years, albeit their lowest-charting one to date.

The U.K. Top 10

1. "Umbrella" - Rihanna feat. Jay-Z *5 weeks*
2. "Icky Thump" - The White Stripes
3. "Do You Know (The Ping Pong Song)" - Enrique Iglesias
4. "Like This" - Kelly Rowland feat. Eve
5. "Real Girl" - Mutya Buena
6. "The Girls" - Calvin Harris
7. "Cupid's Chokehold" - Gym Class Heroes feat. Patrick Stump
8. "Beautiful Liar" - Beyoncé & Shakira
9. "Never Again" - Kelly Clarkson *new*
10. "Here (In Your Arms)" - Hellogoodbye

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  • At 12:33 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    i'm SO surprised at Kelly's success here. God, that song is depressing drivel. Thank God for Enrique making the top three an entirely much cuter place to be. And of course, poor Erasure - i've said it before, they seem to be able to only make music that appeals to their hardcore fans. Sigh.

  • At 9:58 AM, Blogger Adem IAR said…

    The only reason I'll buy the Kelly song when it's released in Oz is because it's Kelly. She could take a shit in a bag and record it (which she seems to have done effortlessly here) and I'd fork out the $3.00 for the single. She is the only Destiny I will support SOLELY for the "Mary's got the same sized hands as Marilyn Monroe" line in "Stole", which has provided myself & Ben with HOURS of entertainment.

  • At 9:59 AM, Blogger Adem IAR said…

    I meant Kelly Rowland, not the Lesbian.

  • At 12:18 PM, Blogger J'ason D'luv said…

    Paul, I've been thinking perhaps we're being too harsh on poor Kelly? I think Clive's beating her down enought...

    Adem, I figured you meant KR... and that's one damn good reason for buying that single.

  • At 6:57 PM, Anonymous Darrell R said…

    I dont understand why people don't like her single "Never Again." I personally think it's great and i love the fact that she is exploring her darker side.

  • At 8:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm not surprised some people don't like "Never Again" given all the rubbish they are used to haering on the radio nowadays.

  • At 1:16 PM, Anonymous Aldous said…

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