dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Sorry, Kelly Clarkson...December Belongs To The Spice Girls

Accompanied by what appeared to be Joan Rivers and a Union Jack-waving transvestite they picked up outside McDonald's, Geri Halliwell, Emma Bunton and Melanie B, announced during a press conference today at London's former Millenium Dome, the o2 Arena, that they'd gladly take 5 million apiece for a 12-date world tour starting in December.

Richard E. Grant, (different transvestite than the above-mentioned), presented the five Spice Girls at the half-hour press event, saying they'd “bring some colour back to your lives.” The broads promised the concerts would contain “five girls, lights, dancing, the dark side of the Spice Girls, and topless dancing”

Here are 11 of the 12 dates, as posted by NME this morning (glad they're being so considerate and kicking it all off in D'luv's neck of the woods):

Los Angeles (December 7)
Las Vegas (December 8)
New York (December 11)
London (December 15)
Köln [Cologne] (December 20)
Madrid (December 23)
Beijing (January 10)
Hong Kong (January 12)
Sydney (January 17)
Cape Town (January 20)
Buenos Aires (January 24)

As the Girls say in this EPK, check out SpiceGirls.com to register for tickets:

The tour will be preceded by a greatest hits album in November, which will also contain new material.

Oh, and here's this week's boring ol' U.S. Top 10:

1. "Umbrella" - Rihanna feat. Jay-Z *5 weeks*
2. "Party Like A Rockstar" - Shop Boyz
3. "Big Girls Don't Cry" - Fergie
4. "Hey There Delilah" - Plain White T's
5. "Buy U A Drank (Shawty Snappin')" - T-Pain feat. Yung Joc
6. "Makes Me Wonder" - Maroon 5
7. "Girlfriend" - Avril Lavigne
8. "Summer Love" - Justin Timberlake
9. "Rehab" - Amy Winehouse
10. "Make Me Feel Better" - Fabolous feat. Ne-Yo *airplay gainer*

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  • At 2:41 PM, Blogger Phil said…

    Mel C looks sooo happy and is NOT reading the first intro bit. She's thinking "£5 million. £5 million"...

    I've already registered!

  • At 7:47 PM, Anonymous Faboorangutan said…

    I'm feeling so underwhelmed. If they can't even feign interest in this, why should we?

  • At 8:02 PM, Blogger J'ason D'luv said…

    Really? I think they seem into it. They seem quite giddy in their little taped interviews... Well, except for Mel C, I suppose.

    I registered, too, Phil.

  • At 4:54 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    i have no interest whatsoever. However, I am in Las Vegas on Dec 8th so if you want to do a road trip d'luvvly, i will throw my all into spicing up your life for a night. Oo-er!

  • At 11:40 AM, Blogger J'ason D'luv said…

    I'll bring the nickels.

  • At 1:13 PM, Anonymous numbfromdrugs said…

    OK, Scary looks like Mariah with a bad spot of fake-n-bake; Posh looks like a robot; Baby is already looking like a granny; Sporty looks like Velma from Scooby Doo... and Ginger looks positively radiant. How did that happen?

  • At 3:42 PM, Blogger Adem IAR said…

    This is more exciting than the news of a Sex & The City movie being back on the cards.

    Within 2 minutes of that press conference I was reminded why I obsessed so heavily over Mel B... she's an absolute nutbag. I haven't been so filled with joy quite possibly in all my life*. And I TOTALLY OWN being a loser for it.

    *In regards to pop culture comebacks.

  • At 8:00 PM, Blogger joshua said…

    "Scary looks like Mariah with a bad spot of fake-n-bake"

    Actually, Mariah is Mariah with a bad spot of fake-n-bake. It's unfortunate, but true.

    I am SO excited for this reunion. It's been too long coming! I missed them the first time they came here (It was the same night as Janet's Velvet Rope concert - the tour planners must have been homophobic to make the gays choose like that) and I am NOT going to miss this even if it means driving down 7 hours to LA!


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