dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Monday, July 09, 2007

2,000 Trees Died To Bring You This Balderdash

Desperatus Australius! Forget Harry Potter! Jason Donovan's My Story is sure to be the most magical tale of good vs. evil and pop sorcery ever!

Witness these bewitching highlights from the tome's necromantical press release:

* ...behind the squeaky-clean popstar image was a man increasingly addicted to recreational drugs and on a spiralling downwards path until the love of a good woman pulled him through!

* Kylie and Jason became the celebrity couple of the eighties and released the number one Stock, Aitken and Waterman hit "Especially For You" in 1988!

* When Jason sued style magazine The Face for calling him gay, the press tore him apart. Years of binge drug taking and partying to excess followed!

* ...Jason talks candidly about the drugs that nearly saw the end of his career, about his relationship with the princess of pop, Kylie Minogue, and how he finally got his own very happy ending with the woman who saved him!

But since Jason's book -- which is sure to be studied planetwide in the halls of education for generations to come -- isn't out till October 1, it's probably a good time to catch up on the epic scriptures of these other two elders:

Sir Ego of Doughbutt...

...and Lady Boy Choppedcock.

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  • At 4:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Great blog entry D'Luv.....and even though I've already the hardcover, I'll order the Gary Barlow paperback....just for the new cover...YUM-O!!!!!!!!

  • At 4:29 PM, Blogger J'ason D'luv said…


  • At 5:28 PM, Anonymous The Orangutan's Wig said…

    And it looks like the publishers bought Jase his shiney new hairpiece from the same shop that Pete Ladyburns got her/his!

  • At 6:26 PM, Anonymous not no more he ain't said…

    Wasn't Jason Donovan supposed to be hot or some junk?

  • At 10:10 PM, Blogger Adem IAR said…

    That new cover for the Barlow book is at the very least 50% sexier than the original one. I think I may buy it.

  • At 1:52 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    i fucking hate it when people release their books in paperback with extra chapters! What about the poor schmos who bought it first time round! AARRGGHH!! It's the equiv. of the special edition album (where the track ends up added to the album, then on the new album anyway!) which is kinda moot since iTunes etc. I'll shut up now.

  • At 2:52 PM, Blogger Moogaboo said…

    That look on Gary's face tells me someone's standing in front of the pies again.

  • At 5:06 PM, Anonymous You give me one good reason to leave me said…

    * ...Jason talks candidly about the drugs that nearly saw the end of his career..."

    Hahahehehihihohohuhu! "nearly". The 1993-today period was filled with smashes then?

  • At 6:48 PM, Blogger Phil said…

    Shouldn't La Barlow's book called 'My Cake'?

    And the Heat quote actually finishes with "You'll be hooked...
    ...on doughnuts, just like gary after reading this."

    And, God love 'im, but Pete Burns' book won't have a chapter in the paperback about the 'Comeback of all comebacks'. If it comes out in paperback at all.

  • At 11:18 PM, Anonymous Sidney said…

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