dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Sunday, July 01, 2007

The Terrifying Myth Of Kate Nash


Like the hissing, poisonous serpent Hydra that she is, it seems that since warrior Goddess Cheryl Tweedy lobbed off one of Lily Allen's ghastly heads, the grim, hideous face of Kate Nash has now sprung up in its place. Snake Nash's first official single on a major label, "Foundations," debuts at #2 on the isle of Brythons this week, failing to dethrone Empress Rihanna Of The Posh Wig. And like gob-face Allen, Kate appears to be just another dame with a chip on her shoulder because some unlucky sap finally took off the beer goggles. Witness the horror:



The guy in the video looks like he'd be a hot bounce, though.

Jack Peñate also enters the Top 10, at #7, with a song rivaling the best of the John Mayer catalogue. "Torn On The Platform" no doubt got an added boost from recent BBC coverage of last week's Glastonbury festival featuring the singer. Meanwhile, Take That's "I'd Wait For Life" makes a deadly plunge to #50 after a Robbie Williams-like appearance at #17 last week.

Finally, at #40, it's Mark Ronson featuring Lily Allen with aptly-titled "Oh My God."

The U.K. Top 10

1. "Umbrella" - Rihanna feat. Jay-Z *7 weeks*
2. "Foundations" - Kate Nash *new*
3. "Do You Know (The Ping Pong Song)" - Enrique Iglesias
4. "Had Enough" - The Enemy *new*
5. "Any Dream Will Do" - Lee Mead
6. "Worried About Ray" - Hoosiers
7. "Torn On The Platform" - Jack Peñate *new*
8. "Like This" - Kelly Rowland feat. Eve
9. "The Girls" - Calvin Harris
10. "Heavyweight Champion Of The World" - Reverend & The Makers

Labels: , , , ,

6 Comments:

  • At 4:37 PM, Blogger MrBrady said…

    I know where I'd like to lay foundations for Kate Nash, just need to make sure I flush afterwards...

    .. as for Lily Allen, blimey wasn't that song bad enough the first time 'round?

    I'll stop now. I'm starting to sound a little anonymous.

    D'Luv - Tiger Tiger. OMG.

     
  • At 5:12 PM, Anonymous brian said…

    Just a couple of thoughts on the Kate Nashty video.

    1.I think I did shag the boy in this video last week in Atlanta.

    2. I was pretty horrified by the green gingham table cloth.

    3. Cookies were then tossed when I saw the stairs with their step coverings in an array of nashty florals & patterns.

    4.I felt like Clive Davis listening to a Kelly Clarkson CD. Where was the hook?

    5.I believe Sophie Ellis-Bextor is the only performer right now I enjoy singing with a British accent.

    6.I can't dog Lily Allen. She was so sweet when i met her in Atlanta a few months back.

     
  • At 10:57 PM, Blogger xolondon said…

    YAY Lily, boo Kate.

    Poor D'luv has lost an eye. And Moogabooboo has clearly just re-dressed after a nooner!

     
  • At 1:43 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    ooo hello moogaboo! Anyway, i haven't even heard the kate nash song, my finger is obviously not on the pulse whatever that means. Poor take that. At least their album is clinging on to a top forty "slot". I am v pleased to see Enemy and Hoosiers in the top ten. Woo and may i add hoo. Gareth Gates ranked 23 in the album charts....

     
  • At 11:09 AM, Blogger J'ason D'luv said…

    Mr. B! Where've you been? Your wicked comment just made me realize I could've gone with a "Cask Of Amontillado" theme for Kate... I'll save that one for later.

    Brian, well, re: 1... give details! 4. Hook? Where's the Auto-Tune? 6. Well, the bump you did off her slumped-over corpse in the men's room probably clouded your judgement.

    XO, you know I have two glass eyes, right? You should see me juggle.

    Paul, MoogaBoo is available for parties, weddings and communions.

     
  • At 7:49 PM, Blogger Adem IAR said…

    "Like the hissing, poisonous serpent Hydra that she is, it seems that since warrior Goddess Cheryl Tweedy lobbed off one of Lily Allen's ghastly heads, the grim, hideous face of Kate Nash has now sprung up in its place."

    The Pulizter's on its way.

     

Post a Comment

<< Home