dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Friday, February 01, 2008

Drop Your Socks And Grab Your Mini Boombox: It's The Kylie Minogue Banterview!

With a friendship forged on a mutual love for all things Minogue, the time seemed right for D'luv and MoogaBoo to sit down for a Kylie banterview!

D'LUV: Okay, let's just address the fact that the video for "Wow" premiered this week on Perez Hilton.com. Perez Hilton! It truly is a sign of the times. And, I bet she had to let him wear the gold short-shorts in return for such classy promotion.

MOOGABOO: Babe, if his blog gets Kylie a #7 hit in England, it'll be a good thing. But I'm afraid one day we'll all look back and say that was the day the music died.

D: Yeah, roll over, Buddy Holly -- Kylie's industrial-sized go-go boots just fell over.

M: But seriously, I love how colorful and slap-dash the "Wow" and "In My Arms" videos look. They're so fun! Kylie's gotten back to cheap and it feels so good.

D: True, true. I'm more partial to the one for "In My Arms." Who cares if she robbed the concept from Robyn and the sunglasses from Kanye -- nobody lives through a dance-off with Kylie, hookers!

M: She also kicked Róisín Murphy into the sewer with that crazy checkered cowl-necked mini skirt thing.

D: Poor Róisín. Pity about the eye, but watch with the one that's still working and learn, love.

M: The jittery tape effects and Kylie's perfect lipsync of the intro "Oh!" really put "In My Arms" over for me. It's such a departure from what we've gotten used to from her, like that runny mess "Chocolate" or the wasted opportunity that was the "Breathe" clip. Kylie doesn't mesh well with expensive video budgets.

D: The "Oh!" has always been my favorite part of the song. That little Calvin Harris is a fine producer. I'm sure if he wasn't gay before playing with Kylie's boobs in the studio, he's gotta be knee deep in taffeta now.

M: Lots of fans apparently wanted Calvin in the video, and I'll admit it would have made for a sexy cameo. Some other fans wanted Taiwanese singer Jolin Tsai in the video, "for some lesbian innuendo." She apparently sings on "In My Arms" on the Asian edition of X.

D: Well, if they wanted some lesbian no one in Europe has ever heard of, why not just get Dannii Minogue?

M: Right. Not only would it give Dannii a confidence boost to have real work again, it might also introduce her to what a video shoot with half a budget looks like.

D: I'm guessing the most expensive video Dannii's ever been in was when the ceiling cam caught her bumping rug with that dame in the strip joint.

M: At least we got Kylie's album before all the EMI brouhaha went down and artists like Robbie Williams started holding their latest recordings hostage.

D: Isn't he holding his new album back after finding out EMI re-routed the millions of unsold Rudebox discs to a Chinese construction zone? Meanwhile, EMI is probably sweating now: "Shit! Give it over, Robbie... the Queen needs new tiling in the foyer!"

M: Here's the thing; you could put Robbie, Dannii, Jolin Tsai and Celine Dion in a spaceship, shoot them off to the planet QwyZaark, and showbiz would totally go on.

D: Aww. Poor Celine. Her post-Vegas album didn't really yield a big comeback for her, did it?

M: Well, I'm glad Celine flopped. She was so not adding anything new to the dialogue. Unlike Kylie, who totally has new sunglasses which I love!

D: So, apparently "Wow" is going to be the first U.S. single off X. I've kind of given up on over-analyzing which song off each Kylie album shoulda, coulda, woulda been the right one to make her a star here, so I'll just say that if Cascada can see lightning strike twice, surely there must be room for Kylie's third coming?

M: Well, let's face it -- Kylie ain't never gonna have a U.S. hit again. But isn't that partly why we love her ? I really think she could give a shit less about the U.S. charts at this point, unlike Nicole Scherzinger, who's releasing the fifth single from her soon-to-be aborted album, Her Name Was Nicole.

D: That's depressing.

M: It's called "Physical" and it was produced by Timbaland. There's a fan-made YouTube clip. Wanna bet she posted it herself?

D: Oh, I bet even she doesn't listen to her music.


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  • At 7:01 PM, Blogger Mike said…

    Bitches, please! Showbiz would screech to a grinding halt if Dannii's lazy fanny disappeared from the scene. Furthermore, the original version of In My Arms (ie. Dannii's So Under Pressure) is far superior. Face it - Dannii looks better in a box!

    Apart from that I love both clips. They're really colourful and fun. I slightly prefer Wow because Kylie is only really ripping off herself in that clip.

    And ouch - Wow cost A LOT more than Chocolate or Breathe! Check out the behind the scenes filming:


  • At 7:49 PM, Blogger Trailer Trashlee said…

    "Dannii looks better in a box"?

    That's what SHE (read=every low-rent Euro tart who's gotten the needle put on it by Danzii) said. Err, cooed.

  • At 1:44 AM, Anonymous Never Trust an Orangutan said…

    "Not only would it give Dannii a confidence boost to have real work..."

    Ouch! (But awesome and unfortunately too true) I enjoyed the banterview way more than the Kylie video too.

  • At 5:49 AM, Blogger John said…

    I'm on Kylie overload right now...two new videos, plus I finally saw the Doctor Who episode from Christmas that Kylie was in. God bless video set makeup, because they sure didn't do a good job of it on the show. She looked about 50, although most women would kill to look like that at 50.

    "X" comes out in the US, America yawns...my tragedy repeats itself once again.

  • At 11:11 AM, Blogger Adem With An E said…

    At the end of the day, Dannii's had the last laugh by giving Kylie the number of the wrong cosmetic surgeon.

  • At 1:57 PM, Blogger Poster Girl said…

    Oh, I have been all about Dannii this week--her music has soundtracked my week (/half week)! Hurrah for new Kylie videos, though, too.

  • At 11:51 AM, OpenID troystar said…

    Both video's are Fabulous but I prefer In My Arms, it's so classic Kylie. The reason I want Kylie to have a hit in the US is so she can tour here and I can go see the show.

    BTW don't diss my home girl Celine. Her album is doing just fine.

    Kylie's Canadian Fandom

  • At 2:17 PM, Anonymous Tropico said…

    Lets hope Kylie has a hit in the U.S. with the poor output from our home grown divas we need something! With the crap Madonna is trying to pass as R&B and radio not giving Janet a break let Kylie and Robyn fill the void. Celine is a glorified karaoke singer and should take her "show" to Reno.

  • At 7:49 PM, Blogger D'luv said…

    So glad the Dannii jabs got under your skins, luvs. Our work here is done.

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