dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Hopefully Madonna Won't Suck On Hard Candy

The Red Sea parted, time stood still and Jesus keeled over as Hard Candy, the name of Madonna's forthcoming album, was announced today.

There seems to be some sort of confectionary theme going on here since the album, her final for Warner Bros., also contains a song called "Candy Shop." As well, the set was previously rumored to be called Licorice.

I'm still always a bit suspicious of the Material Senior's entendres. Like, I can't help thinking "Candy Shop" is just naughty innuendo for her hoo hoo -- in which case she should have just called it "Ground-Up Rat With A Runny Egg Cracked Open On Top Of It." Alas, Madge's publicist offers up a less colorful explanation, saying the Olde Vampyre "loves candy."

Fascinating! But all kidding aside, I for one am looking forward to a fun record of summer jams from the ol' gal. Here's hoping she delivers.



  • At 8:59 AM, Anonymous Lene Alexander's Boobs said…

    Hilarious post--too many great line to mention. Gold starzzz!

  • At 9:30 AM, Blogger El MarvelOso said…

    You had to put an egg on it, didn't 'cha...

  • At 10:57 AM, Blogger Robb said…

    "Candy Shop" would be far more inventive as a double-entendre if 50 Cent already didn't have a massive hit with the same title and theme. I can't believe she's not embarrassed about that.

    And we've all heard that mess of a song already, and it's not good.

  • At 2:03 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    What? Madge hasn't had a "fun record" with "jams" since You Can Dance!

  • At 8:35 PM, Blogger xolondon said…

    runny egg. ewwww

  • At 4:33 PM, Blogger D'luv said…

    LAB, thanxxx!

    El Marv, I know... I'm icky, huh?

    Robb, I wonder if she has Swedish fish in her candy shop?

    Joshua, hot new avatar, kiddo!

    XO, it's all about the mental image.


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