dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Friday, February 22, 2008

The Week That Was: February 22, 2008

This is what I'm talkin' about...look at this crazy broad!

Goblet of Chablis in one hand, stiletto heels in the other -- both strategically placed over Mariah Carey's topless platinum hits! I now feel fully justified for my rant on Towleroad earlier this week about falling for Mimi's diabolical charms. After all, the Butterfly must be fed!

One pic from this "session" made the rounds online last month, but Egotastic just got ahold of all the gemz in their full, curvy glory.

This one actually just looks like trouble. You know she's got a jar of Skippy in her Fendi tote back at the cabana.

And what's a Friday without news about pop's most talented super-diva, Heidi Montag? (Cue up the "Higher" screencaps.)

Heidi's boyfriend Spencer Pratt, the master craftsman who shot the "Higher" clip, tells In Touch he's now also the soulful nightingale's manager.

"The next thing is to really focus on her new music and get her onstage and on a world tour," Spencer rambles.

Then he refers to Madonna, Michael Jackson and Britney Spears: "What we want is for Heidi is for her to perform like they do."

"She could have these huge, unbelievable, explosive performances, with pyrotechnics and lots of costume changes."

Careful, Spence. "Pyrotechnics" is a pretty big word, there.

Is anyone else really sick of hearing about how big Leona Lewis is gonna be in America? I'd say just happen already so radio overplay your hits and then toss you in the gutter with your sophomore album, but Leona's got Clive behind her, which is like having a big pink flop-proof vest on.

And what a lazy hooker. Here's what Leona's manager, Richard Griffiths, told Billboard:
"We have absolutely no plans for her to tour until 2010. We're going to make [Spirit] the biggest record in the world, then we'll make another record in 2009, and tour on the back of that."
If I were Leona's manager, I'd be like, "Get on the stage and dance, bitch! I want a pony!" Spirit drops (dead) in the States April 8.

He warbles on:
"America is looking extremely positive. J Records is doing an incredible job there. She's going to have a long, successful career. We'll be back and picking up awards in years to come. She's had so many great things happen in her life already."
Yeah, like lining your bank account, Geppetto.

Leona Lewis Can Kiss My Unimpressed Butt
* You Cruel Bastards All Made Heidi Montag cry!
* Heidi's other song, "Body Language," which is actually a total jam!
* You're On Notice, Madonna: Mariah Carey's New Album Out April 15

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  • At 11:32 PM, Anonymous Vicky Pollard said…

    Leona's career may last a while since she since dresses like she's in the world's oldest profession...though the bird's tits do look like the pair of old cucumbers that'd gone soft in me crisper drawer.

  • At 7:43 AM, Blogger El MarvelOso said…

    oh d'luv... When you're ready, I know a private place where you can get help with this Mariah intoxication.

    Be strong.

  • At 8:16 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    Good lorte being told who to like and who is going to be huge. Sure Leona has a nice voice and Bleeding Love and Better In Time are quite lovely. Where are the My Name Is Not Susan and Queen of The Nights though? Disco it up a bit you miserable troll.

    Mariah - ugh. Though i do miss the pics of her with some lackey holding a straw to her lips for her. I bet someone moves her boney hips up and down while she is shagging her latest guest rapper.

  • At 11:59 AM, Blogger Poster Girl said…

    I like to really like Leona's "The Best You Never Had" and "Whatever It Takes," and even "Bleeding Love"...

    ...but I have SO much resentment built up towards her; I really don't want her to be successful here. It's awful, and I do really feel bad about it--I'm not usually this vitriolic about artists, and she's probably a really sweet lovely girl, and really, my resentment isn't her fault--I think it's mainly because her whole career has been treated with kid gloves; every time I see the success she's having, I can't help but think "what if Simon Cowell had put that much effort and care into his other winners' careers? What if there had been that much hype behind other artists?"

    In other news, I may be starting to like that Mariah song more.

  • At 12:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Mariah my dear , please , for once drop the booze & slippers & show us your gold mine !

  • At 4:21 PM, Anonymous mariah's straw-holder & platinum pussy polisher said…

    Soulful nightingale!! BRILLIANT!

    Heidi and Meems should duet!

    Was listening to the Ryan Seacrest (nee Casey Casem) countdown today, and Janet Jackson was on. She talked about how she'd love to work with Mariah, but she had just met her this year, and she hadn't even met Madonna yet.

    Seems like I remember Mariah saying that she only wanted to duet with someone who could sing...

    Could be interesting.

    Anyway, with Janet sounding more and more like a robot even in her interviews, glad to see that the truly deserving megatalent is getting some attention.

    Keep your Leona and her Bleeding D'Luv...we want HEIDI!!

  • At 7:18 AM, Blogger Adem With An E said…

    My best friend Ben, when told by me she looked like a horse, replied with "one of those fancy ones I suppose. But a horse nonetheless."

  • At 2:43 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    Mariah's not a horse - she's a show pony!

  • At 2:45 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    I am a little disturbed with the overhype Leona is getting. It's kind of crazy. I'm already sick of Bleeding Love and it hasn't even hit the US yet... It would be nice if she has megasuccess - it would certainly open up a market in the US that's been long dormant


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