dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Usher's New Single Jumps 50 Positions To #1, Yet Still Manages To Sound Like Juvenile Claptrap

Good ol' Usher. At the age of 29, he looks like he could use more under-eye cream and less time with strippers. Still, the handsome laddie racks up his eighth #1 single on Billboard's Hot 100 this week with "Love In The Club." Last week it was at #51. I've already stated my thoughts on this one, and the only consolation is that Mariah Carey's "Touch My Body" (currently #24) is scheduled to be added to iTunes on Tuesday, so hopefully "Love..." is ushered out of the club quickly. Three cheers, though, for Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown's "No Air" landing at #6.

Meanwhile, why does everything come back to Janet Jackson lately? Yesterday it was reported she has the #1 album, and "Feedback," which moves from #53 to #19, is the Hot 100's Sales Gainer. It's now her highest-charting single since 2001's "Someone To Call My Lover."

God, remember that trash? No wonder she was sentenced to seven years of no hits afterward.

And like an alley cat crouching in the shadows, ready to pounce on a rat, Payola Leona Lewis creeps up to #41 with bland dirge "Bleeding Love."

Yeah, more like bleeding ears, slut.

The U.S. Top 10:

1. "Love In This Club" - Usher Feat. Young Jeezy *1 week* *airplay*
2. "Low" - Flo Rida Feat. T-Pain
3. "With You" - Chris Brown
4. "Don't Stop The Music" - Rihanna
5. "Love Song" - Sara Bareilles
6. "No Air" - Jordin Sparks Duet With Chris Brown
7. "Apologize" - Timbaland feat. OneRepublic
8. "No One" - Alicia Keys
9. "Independent" - Webbie, Lil' Phat & Lil' Boosie
10. "Sensual Seduction" - Snoop Dogg

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  • At 11:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Are you talking about the "Rigged Hot 100 chart"? The sales component of that particular chart is now manipulated/rigged by the record companies! Rather than allowing songs to be available for release the moment you can hear them on the radio, the record companies supress internet downloads until three or four weeks of airplay has been garnered and a resultant high position on the airplay charts.

    Usher's record label just bought a "#1 hit" in this way because all of the downloads that would have been spread out over four weeks, were condensed into one week! Mariah Carey's label will attempt to do the same in a couple of weeks with "Touch My Body" assuming that the airplay doesn't completely drop off the planet by then - it's slowing fast in case you didn't notice. The crime of record labels buying "#1 hits" is greater than anything happening in the music industry at the moment.

  • At 1:35 PM, Blogger Yuяi said…

    8 #1s??! I can name 1. You know how it works, D'luvzie, the faster they hit #1, the faster they go away. Here's hoping it won't be long before we have a new #1. God, hopefully not 10 weeks more...

  • At 2:38 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    Well, this is not any different from the 90s when physical singles were still available and chart manipulation was rampant then!

    And Robbie, I have never heard anyone refer to a black man as a "handsome laddie" before. That, in and of itself, is pure magic.

  • At 2:39 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    One more thing: You didn't like Someone To Call My Lover????? But it's pure pop heaven! From the guitar lick samples to the happy bass chorus, it's a fun song all around!!! Right????

  • At 4:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Yuri, you're right! Usher has only had ONE #1 hit! "Yeah" spent four weeks at #1 in 2004. "Burn", "My Boo", and "Caught Up" all peaked at number 2. His best two songs - "U Got It Bad" and "You Make Me Wanna" peaked at 3 and 7.

  • At 5:06 PM, Blogger D'luv said…

    Usher has had eight #1's in the U.S. on the Billboard Hot 100. Yuri meant he could only think of one because the others all bite it.

    Joshua, let's just say it wasn't my favorite, doll.

    FBLC, record labels pulling shady tactics to get a song to #1? Gasp!! Love the nickname!

  • At 5:43 PM, Blogger Mike said…

    Somebody wake me when that bleeding cunt has fucked off back to the Essex council flat where she belongs...

  • At 7:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    THIS JUST IN!!!: The Hot 100 is not an accurate measure of hits!

  • At 7:38 PM, Blogger D'luv said…

    But let me guess... Leona Lewis' vagina is?

  • At 7:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    When's the next Leona Lewis fan convention? I'll be sure to drive a semi truck directly through while that no-talent fishwife is screeching onstage. Plus, it should eliminate the rampant whoreanus-ity flocking to this sterling establishment (i.e. Fred Bronson's Love Child, Anonymous, d'Luv Needs An Education, etc.).


  • At 8:15 AM, Blogger Moogaboo said…

    "Love in the Club" is like every bad R. Kelly cliche from 2003 condensed into one rotten song. If only La Montag had thought of this.

  • At 10:09 AM, Anonymous Phillip said…

    This will not really work, I suppose this way.
    here | url | url


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