dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

The Week That Was: March 1, 2008

Folks, here's my problem with the majority of today's overplayed R&B hits -- they've either got no melody, or they've got great melodies and shit lyrics. Usher's new ballad, "Love In This Club," falls into the latter category. Produced by Polow da Don, who synthed up Fergie's "Glamorous," it's got a great musical track. But the trouble starts when Usher begins belting out his asanine, "shorty"-riddled lines.

That said, it shot to the top of iTunes' download chart a day after being made available this past Tuesday, and it's got U.S. chart hit written all over it. So hoo-ray!

In a flurry of hastily dashed-off emails, naughty kids the world over got ahold of a radio rip of Madonna's new single, "Four (4?) Minutes To Save The World" yesterday. Not that I did. We all know D'luv doesn't support illegal file-sharing! Anyway, the song is great! The Material Senior rightly turns the reigns over to Timbaland, who overproduces the shit out of the track (in a good way!) while Justin Timberlake's vocals sidle up to, tickle and then pound Vadge like the wanton dowager she is.

She's aiming for a big U.S. radio hit, and this is her surest shot at getting one. Viva la Protools!

Meanwhile, looks like Janet Jackson might get some love this time around, after all. At the 11th hour, "Feedback" has managed to become the ninth most-downloaded song these past couple days. Chalk it up to renewed interest since this is the week Discipline was released. Well, either that or she's standing at the checkout line at Best Buy and offering free lapdances to everyone that buys a copy of her album. Hmmm.

On second thought, she probably wouldn't risk it like that -- because if her c**k slipped out of her skirt, everyone would realize she actually sent LaToya in her place.

There just really is no end to the amount of low-rent publicity pop wannabe Heidi Montag will do to promote her z-grade trash tunes. This week, in an interview with US Weekly, there's a report that Heidi has apparently "fired her producer, whom she blames for her debut clunker."

Meanwhile, as if it's the producer's fault she sounds like an banshee getting her snatch tasered! But here's the best quote: "'Higher' wasn't the sound I wanted as an artist. The new stuff is so much better!"

Artist!! She's apparently unleashing more music this month.

On a final note, here's the new Gnarls Barkley video, "Run."

The song's on iTunes, and the album's out in April. I dunno, is it me or is the Gnarls Barkley gimmick just really dull at this point? I guess if I was a 14-year-old who never heard a single oldie from the '60s this might be cool.

And, yes, that's Justin Timberlake as the TV show host. The whore.

Labels: , , , , ,


  • At 3:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Madonna is the weakest part of the song! She gives Justin the killer hook - bummer. Good song still.
    Janet's "Feedback" is in a couple commercials and MTV has welcomed her back from exile and she's featured throughout their reality shows. So the new record company is using every outlet to get the song out there. Its so sad that MTV doesn't play music anymore and the only way to hear or see videos is snippets between shows. They suck.

  • At 3:21 PM, Blogger Cristián said…

    Would like to do a halt here to commend you on your writing style, Robbie. As one of your international non-English-as-primary-language readers, I must confess your posts always become a double feature for us: there's the content in itself (always fascinating and catchy) and then there's also the rich level of English you use in your writing (always educating and pushing to discover rarely colloquially heard words and language structures).
    Keep it playing! :)

  • At 4:45 PM, Blogger Benjamin Boudreau said…

    I completely agree...since Justin's own tunes are now beyond overplayed, somehow he weaseled his way into the lead role of Madonna's new ditty.

  • At 4:32 AM, Blogger Poster Girl said…

    I never could stand Gnarls Barkley's "Crazy"--I've reconciled myself to their popularity being incomprehensible to me.

    I had no idea about that Fergie/Usher connection! Interesting...thanks for that.

    I love "4 Minutes," though I wonder if the production once I hear it in high quality will make me like it more or less. I even love Justin's vocals on it, though, which is a rare thing for me to say.

  • At 11:04 PM, Blogger D'luv said…

    Anonymous, agree on Madonna and MTV!

    Cristian, I know, right? I'm like an educator to the masses on how great words like "broad" and "ho" are. Stick with me, chyldren, and ye shall be taught! But in all seriousness, I'll keep it playing as long as you keep reading :)

    BB, it's like, I wake up and Justin's inside me... how did this happen?

    PG, I made the mistake of downloading Gnarls Barkley's full album two years ago, because, you know, they're arty! Yeah, never listen to the shit.

  • At 11:42 PM, Blogger Mike said…

    Oh no, you didn't! My beloved Toy Toy is no she-male and Playboy has the pictures to prove it! May Queen Toy smite you down with her juicy clit of death.

  • At 1:50 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    Wow, that song is A HOT MESS. It's Me Against The Music + Promiscuous Girl to the Power of White Squared

  • At 2:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    pity the "boy wonder" couldn't work the same magic for duran duran
    despite telling everyone how much he loved the band
    he's been mighty quiet about the project.


Post a Comment

<< Home