dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Ashley Tisdale Mauls '80s Classics (And Cathy Dennis) On Her Shit New EP

Thanks (I think) to Mobius for the tip-off on this classy trash...

Doll, just stick to getting fake tits and the High School Musical numbers. Ashley Tisdale has done her soulless take on classic pop songs by Belinda Carlisle ("Heaven Is A Place On Earth"), Cyndi Lauper ("Time After Time") and Whitney Houston ("I Wanna Dance With Somebody") for a new EP due on iTunes this month -- Degree Girl: OMG! Jams -- promoting her campaign for Degree deodorant. Hot.

Even worse, she raped Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" and Cathy Dennis' "Too Many Walls":



Okay, Ashley might possibly be a better singer than Cathy Dennis. But what the hell? These are being touted as '80s cover versions, but "Too Many Walls" isn't even from the '80s. Whoever was behind this project was probably snorting too much Degree.

Just take the cash and never look back, Ashley. Because if you do, you'll cry in deep, paralyzing shame.

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9 Comments:

  • At 7:23 PM, Blogger xolondon said…

    She. cannot. sing. Total studio creation.

     
  • At 7:43 PM, Blogger Mike said…

    Wow! An American diva with taste! Where can I purchase this sure to be exquisite recording? If only my beloved Ashlee would do something as classy!

     
  • At 8:11 PM, Blogger Cristián said…

    Never gonna give us up?
    Ashley dear, could you please do us all a big favor and rather than never actually do give up, on that song, say like, right now...?

     
  • At 8:13 PM, Blogger Cristián said…

    ...because you're really not trying to become all desperately Ashley-rolled, right?

     
  • At 8:20 PM, Blogger Jump! said…

    D-luv, I cannot believe you would say such vile things about Cathy Dennis' vocal stylings. I'm shocked.

     
  • At 8:56 PM, Blogger Moogaboo said…

    I really don't like her new nose.

    However, her cover of Never Gonna sounds pretty nice to my jaded ears, and Too Many Walls could have been much worse. I do wish Heaven is a Place and Dance With Somebody would disappear forever, as they were overplayed in 1987 and they've really n ever gone away.

     
  • At 11:17 PM, Anonymous Dannii's Pussii said…

    You're perfection and I won't give you up. La Tiz, how can you be so damn perfect?

     
  • At 1:28 PM, Anonymous numbfromdugs said…

    Wait, wait... this album is called Degree Girl: OMG! Jams?

     
  • At 7:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Better singer than Cathy Dennis LOL! What are you fuckin deaf? Studio and voice synthesized shite!

     

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