dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Britney Spears' New Single Is About—Brace Yourselves, Children—Sex

Britney Spears' new Max Martin-produced single "3" popped up all over the place today after it debuted on New York Top 40 station Z100. And—what's this?—she's singing about getting nailed by three or four people or some shit. I can't tell, I kinda tuned out after half a listen.

Don't get me wrong! In the pantheon of Britney Spears singles, this is up there with the works of Tchaikovsky. I mean, lest we glance back in horror—"Do Something," anyone?

But, as a Max Martin jam? Sounds like someone's on $autopilot$!

In fact, "3" is on par with "Womanizer," possibly the most minimal, lazy hunk of scrap to land at #1 in this country. (And no, I haven't forgotten Snow's "Informer" or Usher's entire back catalog!)

Anyway, this is the new single from Britney's upcoming hits set The Singles Collection. Ironic title, since, according to some reported track listings, it manages to leave off "Sometimes," "Overprotected" and "Break The Ice"—you know, singles.

Oh, well. One, two, three—here comes more cash for Britney!

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  • At 11:18 PM, Blogger hun*ter said…

    Ugh. Terrible song. Another lame attempt by Max Martin to be edgy. Britney hasn't been truly sexy since "Toxic".

  • At 11:33 PM, Anonymous shaun said…

    But but, I kind of love "Womanizer"...popped up on the ole pod today, and I was more than pleased...I mean, at least there's no rap interlude....pretty rare for a #1 these days...

  • At 11:48 PM, Anonymous Somebody Get My Guitar said…

    But "Do Somethin'" was co-written by Virginia Woolf!

  • At 12:53 AM, Blogger Brad said…

    I take great offense to all this.

    Most of all, your silly assumption that this song is about sex. If you were deep enough to get it, you'd know this was written about the crisis in Darfur. It is also about racism. And diamond mining exploitation.

    1, 2, 3!

  • At 3:11 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    it's not very brilliant at all is it?

  • At 4:44 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    I can;t tell is she using a vocoder or is she being strangled? God/bad it'll make momma so cash for a new weave. Job done.

  • At 9:59 AM, Blogger Poster Girl said…

    What, no love even for that middle 8?

    Someone needs to hook up with Max Martin so he can work out all these not-really-that-controversial fantasies of his in private.


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