dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Classy Broad Katy Perry Wants Her Next Album To Sound Like Ace Of Base

I've had a somewhat of a hot N cold relationship with Katy Perry from the get go—basically, if Max Martin and/or Dr. Luke ain't writing and producing the songs, C-YA, baby.

So consider me ecstatic to read this article at MTV News yesterday wherein Katy reveals: "I'm kind of thinking I want to do my record like a mesh between 'Lovefool' by the Cardigans and ['The Sign'] by Ace of Base. I want to make songs that people want to hold hands and roller-skate to."

That, Katy, sounds like a plan. The latest chart position (#85) for "Starstrukk," her song with 3OH!3, on the other hand, does not.

And speaking of the Billboard Hot 100, Black Eyed Peas have now logged 13 weeks at #1. Yes, 13. That's one week longer than "Boom Boom Pow," the previous #1 single in the country. That means BEP have spent 25 weeks at the top of the chart in 2009. That's almost half a F-ing year! The band's "Meet Me Halfway" debuts at #75 this week.

Thankfully, there's some news that doesn't make me want to crush my head in a vice grip, Scorsese-style! Lady GaGa uses her talent, originality and unrivaled beauty to hookerpult "Paparazzi" up from #18 to #7. Papa, papa-sexy!

Meanwhile, British singer Mr Hudson is making leaps and bounds here in the states, albeit from singing the chorus of Alphaville's "Forever Young" on Jay-Z's "Young Forever"—which this week is up from #75 to #41.

And then there's good ol' Leona Lewis, whose "Happy"—which, let's be honest, couldn't possibly sound like any more of "Bleeding Love" carbon copy—debuts at #50. She's no doubt getting a boost from performing on VH1's Divas Live last week, though I wish her rendition of "True Colors" with Cyndi Lauper had been made available on iTunes, instead.

Finally, LMFAO's somewhat decent (though quite frankly, it's a tad snoozy at this point) "La La La" debuts at #61.

Hoo-razzy.

The U.S. Top 10:

1. "I Gotta Feeling" - The Black Eyed Peas *13 weeks*
2. "Run This Town" - Jay-Z feat. Rihanna and Kanye West
3. "Down" - Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne
4. "You Belong With Me" - Taylor Swift
5. "Empire State Of Mind" - Jay-Z feat. Alicia Keys
6. "Party In The U.S.A." - Miley Cyrus
7. "Paparazzi" - Lady GaGa
8. "Forever" - Drake feat. Kanye West, Lil Wayne & Eminem *new*
9. "Use Somebody" - Kings Of Leon
10. "Watcha Say" - Jason DeRulo

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10 Comments:

  • At 11:35 AM, Anonymous shaun said…

    Grrr....I guess no top 10 ever for "She Wolf"...bummer...

     
  • At 2:43 PM, Anonymous Michele said…

    New Rule (and this is a two-parter) designed to facilitate heightened levels of pop culture appreciation:

    1) Robbie, oh brilliantly talented teacher, you must create a new word each day.

    2) We your children and eager students, must learn said daily word and produce demonstrated ability to use it correctly in a sentence.

    I submit my assignment thusly:

    Upon reading my teacher's Thursday post, my heart hookerpulted into my throat with pleasure at the realization that Katy Perry's classiness was not the only topic of the day.

     
  • At 2:58 PM, Anonymous Tuna Piano said…

    Mommy, I want to rollerskate and hold hands with a LESBIAN!

     
  • At 10:25 PM, Blogger hun*ter said…

    When will the Black Eyed Peas go away?

     
  • At 3:45 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    I thought we had new British pop act Waterloo to sound like Ace of Base? Sigh. And ugh when will BEP and Lady Cuckoo go away? (Yes i'm back to that frame of mind!)

    More importantly, how were the Pet Shop Boys?!

     
  • At 6:01 AM, Blogger xolondon said…

    "Lady GaGa uses her talent, originality and unrivaled beauty to hookerpult "Paparazzi" up from #18 to #7." Brilliant.

     
  • At 12:21 PM, Anonymous Pranav said…

    Bands like the Black Eyed Peas should be grateful that they were not around 20 years ago and that mediocrity and geocentricity (not even sure if that is an actual word but I am sure you folks get the point!!!) is the golden standard on the Billboard Hot 100 today. When the range of what is played on "over the air" radio is amazingly limited and hardly anything from outside the US (most notably the UK) gets played here, it shouldn't be surprising that anything can stay at the top the charts as long as 25 weeks. The Black Eyed peas are lucky they were not around in the 80s or early 90s because given the standards of those days, the music of some of these new acts would have never seen the light of day.

     
  • At 4:12 PM, Blogger Poster Girl said…

    "I want to make songs that people want to hold hands and roller-skate to" has just described an entire mini-genre of music I love but have never eloquently summed up. Now that's a playlist waiting to happen.

     
  • At 5:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Katy Perry infused with Swedish awesomeness = WIN!

     
  • At 10:29 PM, Blogger Mr. Will-W. said…

    Gaad. I've learned to not listen to pre-production hype. Apparently "Imperfect Angel" was supposed to be some of Mariah's best work? Watch, there'll be two tracks the remotely resemble Ace of Base on this K-Perr album!

    I agree with XO re: "unrivaled beauty". I spat my tea out. :p~

     

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