dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Friday, January 01, 2010

It's The Final Chart Roundup Of The '00s

This jam is a short one, and is going up at 11:59 p.m., so Happy New Year! And as we kick 2009 to the curb—as well as the '00s in general—I wanna say thanks for tuning in to nearly five years of waxing trashy on the charts. We've definitely come a long way since spring 2005, when 50 Cent ruled the Billboard Hot 100 for way too long with "Candy Shop."

Perhaps the biggest thrill over the past five years has come from seeing pop return to the upper reaches of the U.S. chart, when singles by Gwen Stefani, Mariah Carey, Nelly Furtado, James Blunt, Daniel Powter, Rihanna, Shakira, Fergie, Avril Lavigne, Maroon 5, Justin Timberlake, Chris Brown, Leona Lewis, Coldplay, Katy Perry, Pink, Britney Spears, Beyonce, Lady Gaga, Kelly Clarkson, Jay Sean, Jason Derulo, Owl City and Ke$ha all reached #1.

Speaking of which, Ke$ha's "TiK ToK" tops the Hot 100 for a second week. And like Phil Collins (vomit) ushered in the 1990s with "Another Day In Paradise" (quadruple projectile vomit) and Santana and Rob Thomas' "Smooth" (spraying vomit on the ceiling fan) rang in the new millennium, Ke$ha now has us drunkenly flashing our jugz at the start of this next decade.

"TiK ToK" sold 610,000 digital copies last week, and Ke$ha now has the honor of being the female with the most downloads in one week. But I'm not seeing any of that ca$h—so fuck her.

See you all in 2010!

The U.S. Top 10:

1. "TiK ToK" - Kesha *2 weeks*
2. "Replay" - Iyaz
3. "Bad Romance" - Lady Gaga
4. "Fireflies" - Owl City
5. "Empire State Of Mind" - Jay-Z feat. Alica Keys
6. "Whatcha Say" - Jason DeRulo
7. "Down" - Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne
8. "Party In The U.S.A." - Miley Cyrus
9. "Sexy Chick" - David Guetta feat. Akon
10. "Do You Remember" - Jay Sean feat. Sean Paul & Lil Jon

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  • At 11:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    way too many seans in that list

  • At 2:17 PM, Blogger Moogaboo said…

    It makes me so happy to end the year with Lady Gaga and Kesha in the upper tier of the chart.

  • At 6:29 PM, Blogger Mr. Will-W. said…

    too f'ing funny! :p i am k$ll$ng the ke$ha album of late! happy new year, sluttery!


  • At 10:59 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    ok so the fact your gonna trash Ke$ha pisses me of so fuck you!!!


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