dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

I'm Pissed Off At Shontelle

There are about 37 songs from Drake that debut on the Billboard Hot 100 this week, due to his album Thank Me Later being released (it's #1 over on the Top 200 after sales of 447,000 copies), but the main thing is this—Katy Perry is still #1 this week with "California Gurls," and I kind of want to bump her off a cliff so I can watch her blue wig flap around till she lands in the shark-infested ocean! Then it'll be red and blue wig. Patriotic!

Speaking of which, VV Brown's "Shark In The Water" is up 13 positions to #70 this week. Just love that jam.

Now, something that never ceases to amaze me is the perseverance and durability of Shontelle. Surely, after "T-Shirt" flopped at #36 two years ago (and made Chart Rigger's 10 Worst Singles Of 2008 list), you'd have thought the poor man's Rihanna beautiful Barbadian wanna-diva would have fucked off.

But no! Her tearjerker ballad "Impossible" (produced by Arthor Birgisson, no less!) has somehow made it's way to #17 on the Hot 100. And, you know—it kind of sounds like something off Shayne Ward's last album. So that makes me bitter that he's not at #17 this week and Shontelle is.

Now, you'll excuse me—I have to go break things.

The U.S. Top 10:

1. "California Gurls" - Katy Perry feat. Snoop Dogg *3 weeks*
2. "OMG" - Usher feat. will.i.am
3. "Airplanes" - B.o.B feat. Hayley Williams
4. "Billionaire" - Travie McCoy feat. Bruno Mars
5. "Find Your Love" - Drake 
6. "Your Love Is My Drug" - Ke$ha
7. "Alejandro" - Lady Gaga
8. "Cooler Than Me" - Mike Posner
9. "Not Afraid" - Eminem
10. "Break Your Heart" - Taio Cruz feat. Ludacris

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  • At 10:22 AM, Blogger Vinny Vero said…

    Sweet baby jesus! Does she really rhyme "stay" with "effortlessly"?! That is utter crap! Effortlesslay, indeed.

    Thumbs up for VV Brown. Took her sweet time. That was begging to be a hit in the UK over a year ago.

  • At 10:40 AM, Blogger Paul said…

    ugh shontelle, ugh. why do you exist?

    I'm getting sick and tired of Shayne Hot Hole Ward tweeting for the past year about all his amazing studio sessions. Just fucking release something already! Like your spaff in my mouth...

    i apologise, it's hot, i've had a pimms I'm not myself...

  • At 11:04 AM, Blogger Poster Girl said…

    I kind of liked "T-Shirt," but I'm vehemently anti-"Impossible." I can't believe it's actually doing well. Finger-wag at Arnthor and Ina Wroldsen--you can both do better than this.

  • At 3:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    This blog is utter bull shit.
    Shontelle is the most underrated artist out there.
    She deserves more attention than she gets but shes slowly but surely starting to get it.
    "Slow and steady wins the race."

    Impossible is a hit!

  • At 6:04 PM, Blogger Moogaboo said…

    Hooray for VV Brown! That song has been my jam since last year and I won't be happy until I hear it in every CVS in Pittsburgh.

  • At 9:15 PM, Blogger D'luv said…

    Vinny, time and time again, this broad proves the only good thing she ever had was the album title Shontelligence.

    Paul, right?!? How many tracks are there floating around that's he's recorded, anyway?

    PG, I heard "Impossible" on the radio today and couldn't help thinking that it might sound better with a different artist singing it? Naw, just crap all the way around...

    Anonymous, you left the "s" of "hit," luv.

    Moog, I always think of you with "Shark In The Water" because of your Instinct review :P

  • At 2:37 PM, Blogger Joshua said…

    I can't believe you are all hating on Shontelle like this. T-Shirt is an amazing song that really harkened back to the awesomeness that was mid-90s R&B! VV Brown is amazing; I heard her song for the first time in a GAP store and had to ask the employee who & what it was. She's also done like 5 concerts in San Francisco this year and I've yet to see her once. Aahhh!


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