dispatches from the pop scene...minus the corn syrup.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

M.I.A.'s Completely Massive Flop

Professor Green and Lily Allen's "Just Be Good To Green" makes me want to ram a pitchfork through my face, so naturally it debuted this week higher on the UK singles chart (#5) than Mark Ronson's far superior new jam "Bang Bang Bang" (#6).

But really, I'm just kind of glad for the fail of M.I.A.'s new album Maya. It flops into the UK album chart at #21, while her single "XXXO" tanks at #26. Sorry, baby—next time you feel like ripping countless other pop stars to shreds in the press, why don't you just stuff one of your tits in your mouth? Mmmmm—tastes like whore.

On to classier dames, Kylie Minogue's Aphrodite slips to #2 on the Brit album chart, while her single "All The Lovers" slides from #9 in its fifth week to #12.

The U.K. Top 10:

1. "Airplanes" - B.o.B feat. Hayley Williams *1 week*
2. "We No Speak Americano" - Yolanda Be Cool & DCUP
3. "Love The Way You Lie" - Eminem feat. Rihanna
4. "California Gurls" - Katy Perry
5. "Just Be Good To Green" - Professor Green feat. Lily Allen *new*
6. "Bang Bang Bang" - Mark Ronson and The Business Intl *new*
7. "The Club Is Alive" - JLS
8. "Pack Up" - Eliza Doolittle
9. "I Like It" - Enrique Iglesias feat. Pitbull
10. "My First Kiss" - 3OH!3 feat. Ke$ha

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  • At 2:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    What is Yolanda Be Cool & DCUP?

  • At 3:00 PM, Blogger marQy said…

    I wanted to like MIA & looked forward to this album since the success of Paper Planes but all the trash-talking just didn't impress me. Karma is a bitch!

  • At 6:52 PM, Anonymous BigB said…

    I'd be uncontrollably giddy if i ever heard "We No Speak Americano" on XM or any American station. Summery and fun.

  • At 11:57 PM, Blogger countpopula said…

    I have been on vacation this week--who did MIA diss popwise? Did they deserve it? All I knew about was that newspaper article she disliked & exposed the writer's phone #. Juvenile, yes, but I still like this album.

    When did pop music get so judge-y? I mean, it's just pop music, right? Wrong moves and bad words get exposed so quickly because of the net. Now Mel Gibson is another story--it's not like Maya wanted to bash her husband's head in, right? How many other musicians have said stupid or hateful things in the past about their peers? Recently, Wayne Coyne of Flaming Lips comes to mind, but I'm sure there are too many to worry about. Eminem even made a career out of it, and he still holds #1.

  • At 1:50 AM, Blogger D'luv said…


    M.I.A. vs. Justin Bieber - ""I find the new Justin Bieber video more violent and more of an assault to my eyes and senses than what I've made."

    M.I.A. vs. Lady Gaga - "None of her music’s reflective of how weird she wants to be or thinks she is. She models herself on Grace Jones and Madonna, but the music sounds like 20-year-old Ibiza music, you know? She’s not progressive, but she’s a good mimic. She sounds more like me than I fucking do!"

    M.I.A. vs. Ke$ha, Twilight and The X Factor - "I'm so bored by it already, people need to get over it. X Factor s**t's irrelevant. I'm more concerned by how someone like Ke$ha can so blatantly copy Uffie. Everyone's fine with it. Not a f**king lawsuit in sight."

    "They asked me [to do the soundtrack]. Luckily Jimmy [Iovine, chairmen of M.I.A.'s U.S. label Interscope]had beef with the 'Twilight' people, so he stepped in and told them to f**k off."

  • At 9:00 AM, Anonymous shaun said…

    Can we discuss the bigger issue here -- Mark Ronson is effing adorable and quite boffable!

  • At 10:32 AM, Blogger mrdiscopop said…

    Does MAYA really count as a flop? 21 is her highest-charting album yet. Kala only reached #39, and Arular didn't make the top 40 at all.

  • At 2:17 PM, Blogger Paul said…

    well JLS did fall 6 places from the top Stephen so I suspect the chart run will be much shorter than their more charming/cheesy songs like Beat Again.

    Yes Dluv, once again you are correct. Mark is much better than Prof. More bang bangable too!

  • At 9:56 PM, Blogger countpopula said…

    Thanks for the quotes, Rob. I think MIA's Gaga quote seems a little like how I used to feel about her before I realized she had talent. Maybe MIA just hasn't realized that yet.

    As for the Bieb and Ke$ha, they are both kind of poo, aren't they? And Ke$ha copying Uffie is hysterical since Uff is even poopier! Then again, Katy Perry has a song you could sing along to Ke$ha's biggest hit, so I get what Maya says about lack of originality (blame Dr. Luke for writing identical songs that copy Kylie's Love at First Sight--heck, even Get Outta My Way is reminiscent of that earlier hit).

    As for Twilight, again, she may be ignorant about how good the last two soundtracks have been. Since I don't live in the UK, I can't comment on X Factor, but I can say that American Idol has become quite shit in the past 5 years, with only Adam Lambert really standing out as somebody remotely interesting (sorry Daughtry).

  • At 8:08 PM, Blogger Fritz Liess said…

    M.I.A.'s album cover was voted best of the week in my poll. She's lucky that there weren't any great covers during the release period. I think it is hideous.


  • At 10:19 PM, Blogger Moogaboo said…

    Oh babe, I know she had you lightin' her on fire at the X Files diss!! Fuck not with Mulder & Scully, lady.


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